Useless Column: ‘Faster..harder…faster…faster…faster’

When a man says he has left his wife, pray for him. He may be wealthy and can handle alimony and property division. But if a man says his wife has left him, organize prayers for him. Poverty often drives wives away; they don’t care about alimony.

Being a man is tough, but being a woman can be tougher. Women face many challenges, including hormonal changes and pregnancy. Men struggle even with minor discomforts like constipation! Raising children is also daunting.

Underestimating women is risky for society. Just ask a man whose wife has left him with the kids. It’s no joke! Greetings to all women who love me, even those I upset last Sunday on Mother’s Day! I celebrate you every day!

We secretly appreciate you and hope you never leave us. We may not show it due to our egos! The first time I changed a diaper, my respect for mothers grew immensely. That baby had just started eating solid foods!

I’ve learned to take things easy at home. To be a happy husband, talk to female friends. They understand your wife's feelings better than men do. Male advice often lacks empathy; they use logic instead of understanding.

On another note, sometimes wear your trousers before your singlet just for fun! This column aims to entertain while reminding us to be careful this weekend. If you think fun comes without risks, think again about future medication availability.

A friend of mine is both a doctor and businessman. He planned to build a clinic and bought two plots for a morgue—though I dislike that word! He purchased them at GHC5,000 each in an undeveloped area.

Years later, nearby plots were sold at GHC7,000 each but no buyers came forward. The owners lowered the price back to GHC5,000 but still found no interest. Eventually, they dropped it to GHC1,000—still no luck!

The land was unsold because ambulances frequently passed by on inspection days! After two years of waiting, my friend expressed interest in buying all the plots at GHC500 each—and the owners agreed! Now he’s building an ultra-modern medical center there.

I've learned from Tindanbil that coconut water acts as a mild aphrodisiac. Since then, I've been drinking it daily with good results! However, age brings its own challenges; I need backup support now more than ever.

If I'm not careful in satisfying my needs outside the house, it could lead to trouble! So I do what I can within reason—no need for unrealistic expectations here!

Have a great weekend! Remember: when surrounded by vultures, don’t let yourself get hurt! Avoid dangerous situations if you know you're vulnerable.